We had a lovely dinner at BJ’s restaurant in Jarvisburg. Mom bought us dinner and had made arrnagements to have the table decorsted with flowers and gifts and we were joined for dinner by Tracey, Megan and Grace and Phil and his wife Kathy. afterwards it was a stop by tracey’s house where she and the kids had made a cake and more flowers and presents. Just a wonderful evening we had. Happy Birthday Mrs G! I love you! xxx

Alison’s Birthday

from Teleflora.com The story of lilac, according to Greek mythology, begins with a beautiful nymph named Syringa (lilac’s botanical name). Captivated by her beauty, Pan, the god of the forests and fields, chased Syringa through the forest. Frightened by Pan’s affections, Syringa escaped him by turning herself into an aromatic bush – the flower we now refer to as lilac.

The 8th wedding anniversary flower and the state flower of New Hampshire (symbolizing the hardy character of the Granite State’s citizens), lilacs are frequently considered a harbinger of spring, with the time of their bloom signaling whether spring will be early or late. In the language of flowers, purple lilacs symbolize the first emotions of love, while white lilacs represent youthful innocence.

The first emotions of Love! Well there it was like another bolt of lightening from the sky hitting me! If ever there was a sign sent to me, that was it! Oh some may say its just coincidence, but to me it was our Angels saying , here is the One for you :) and I have never doubted it and only believe it stronger to this day. Oh I’m not good enough with words to convey the emotion I felt… no.. the emotion I still feel to this day. Well the lilacs are in bloom once more and I am more in love than ever before! I love you baby! XX I DO! <3

:)

We decided to spend the third day just staying close to home and resting as the time difference was beginning to catch up with me by the third day and I think Alison was a bit glad to have a break as well! It was still quite hot too so it was a good day to be taking it easy. Well we did venture out and about close to home during the day.

Pics for this post are here:

http://picasaweb.google.com/garazon/Day3Cyprus

We went out early in the morning to the cemetery where Nicos’ memorial is located, not far at all from Alison’s house. It’s a very large cemetery with some very elaborate graves and memorials. It’s a bit of a difference between the cultures here and there in so many ways. Well its striking the appearance first off, all are marble or stone memorials covering almost every inch of the place and most all of them have the photos on them, along with an oil lamp that burns continuously, or intended to burn. Most are maintained and filled with oil. And most have areas around them where flowers and shrubs are planted and there is something blooming everywhere. Seeing some of these large ones in Cyprus ( as well as the smaller ones in the villages) and then seeing the average cemetery here in the States with simple headstones and markers is sort of a shock. Just different cultures and customs. Well that is another post in itself as well for another time… maybe. From the cemetery we back to the house and just spent most of the day relaxing, a run out to the local Carrefour, which is similar to our supermarkets here but a bit bigger, nearer to a superwalmart than just a supermarket as they have everything, clothing, electronics, etc. Well that was another culture shock of sorts. First walking in I noticed all the cashiers were sitting! And nice seats too! lol I have to wonder what some of the cashiers form the store I work would say if they had seen that! those poor folks in the summer time here are on their feet the whole day and can only sit when they take a break in the back, if they’re lucky to even get one. I forget now what we went in to pick up, but I remember mostly just glancing at the brands on the shelf. Well there are a few of the brand new names out, but just the overall appearance of the American name brands that were there looked like a flashback to the 80′s! Even some of the old logo’s. Odd in a way, and then to have them mixed in with the local brands, most in Greek, well I would likely be lost! We really are a spoiled lot here in the US. too many choices I think sometimes. I was particularly wanting to see the meats , since that’s my profession. Well I was shocked at what I saw. Well first of all beef is not as readily available or as popular as it is here, but what they did have in the cases was horrible looking! days old at least and some eye round roasts that were so dried out from sitting in the case they were closer to chunky style beef jerky! they would have sacked the whole meat department on the spot if that was here in the US! None of it was prepackaged either, they were all service type cases and as they were cutting, they just dumped it into the case, and I mean literally dumped it! lol Well I guess its what people are used to, as they seemed busy. Pork and chicken were the biggest sellers and a lot of lamb too from the looks of the case. Well I personally would be afraid to buy anything, but I’m the same way here as being a meat cutter I rarely buy anything unless I cut it myself! ;) It was interesting to see first hand the little differences between here and there, but I am telling all the Americans reading this, you have no idea how spoiled we really are as a nation and how wasteful as well. It gave me a new appreciation, and brought a feeling of shame as well for the nitpicking we do over what are really stupid things to begin with. Now that will be a post in the future, for sure! ;)

We went back to the house and just stayed in the rest of the day. Watched a little tv, tried to take a nap but it was a bit warm and I think really I was still just excited to be there and didnt want to miss anything! We took Benji out for a walk around the neighborhood and I got chance to look around a bit more as up to now it was near dark when we had taken him out. Like everywhere these days its building up fast in Limassol. One of the things that I was amzed about was when they build a house the contractors oor owners will just have the material delivers and they sit out on the sidewalks or road! Same with the demolition debris! Well I guess they clean it all up when they’re done, but for all that time the stuff just sits there, and noboby messes with it! Can you imagine buying a pallet or two of roofing tiles and just storing them in the yard or on the street here? they would be gone the next morning! LOL And I swear I think I could have built a house with all the leftovers just thrown about. When we got back JM and I had a nice game of chess outside at the table while Alison fixed a fabulous meal. She had bought a chicken roll of sorts, well its a boneless rolled stuffed chicken wrapped in bacon and cheese. No not from Carrefour! lol theres a wonderful meat shop right down the road from her house which was very nice as I found out a few days later when we went to get some minced meat( ground pork ) ;) We ate out in the garden and enjoyed a wonderful meal and some wonderful wine! :) I really have developed a taste for it… well some of it… ;) After dinner Frosso came by and we sat and had another bottle and a wonderful evening just chatting and it was a pleasure meeting her. Well I feel I already knew everyone so well from all Alison had talked about them and it didnt seem I was meeting them for the first time really so that was very nice. Well it had to have been a couple of hours we sat out there enjoying the company, and the wine ;) Another wonderful day in Cyprus~ I felt very at home, well, being with Alison… I was home! :)

On the second day, Thursday October 11th, we decided to have a change of scenery and headed off to the Troodos mountains to walk through and tour a couple of the villages, Lania and Omodos. It turned out to be another hot day so it was good we decided to head to the mountains as it would hopefully be a bit cooler, turns out it wasn’t so much cooler at all! But still better than it would have been going somewhere near the sea. Its only a 20 minute drive or so from Limassol but it’s like entering a completely different place and time to see these villages which mostly retain the old way of life.

Photos for this post are here: http://picasaweb.google.com/garazon/Day2Cyprus

Before I go on about the villages I want to relate another story. We needed gas/petrol before we went out too far today and made a pit stop just before leaving Limassol. Well we pulled into one of the stations , can’t remember the name of it right off, well anyway I noticed a couple of employees near the pumps as we pulled in. I didn’t think much of it, one was sitting down in a small chair and I just assumed she was taking a break and I thought the other was just there to collect the money. Well Alison mentioned upon pulling in to see about getting someone to check the water as she had just had a new radiator put in the car and wanted to make sure things were ok before we headed up, and asked me to see is there was 50¢ CYP laying about to tip the guy. Well being from the states I was used to nothing but self service stations and was wondering what the tip was for. Ok we do have a couple of places that come pump the gas for you and collect the money, but that’s all they do. well the guy puts the gas in and heads back to the pump and then I found myself dumbfounded as the guy turns and comes back with a bucket and a squeegee! He then proceeds to clean not only the windshield, but the door windows and back window as well! I was in shock almost! I haven’t seen that kind of service since the late 60′s here in the states! Well he didn’t stop there, Alison popped the hood and the guy checks the oil and topped of the coolant tank as well! WOW! It was one of those twilight zone moments almost! well it made me smile too to see that there are still places that do this sort of thing in the world, I was loving Cyprus even more then. :)

Well with the car filled up we set out on our way. Our first destination was a smaller village that Alison said was one of the more picturesque, Lania.
She was right as usual :)
(description from website ) LANIA
Lania is a small, beautiful village, built at the foot of Mount Troodos on the main Limassol to Troodos road, about 26 Kms from Limassol. Lania is one of the main wine producing villages.
According to tradition, Lania got its name from Lania, daughter of the Greek god of wine and pleasure: Dionysos. This indicates the deep roots of the village in the field of vine-growing and wine-making. The village is well known for the high quality of its grapes and wines.
At the time Erricos was King of France, the country’s vineyards from which champagne was produced were destroyed by disease. The King went in search of healthy plants, which he found in Lania. The plants were loaded on a ship, transported to France and used to replant the Champagne vineyards. It is believed that during his stay in Cyprus, Erricos used to spend time at the Royal Oak of Lania, an 800 year old oak tree which sadly collapsed in 1997. In the same area, only a few metres from the Royal Oak, there is another oak tree, even bigger and well worth a visit.
The inhabitants of the village are occupied with vine-growing and the production of wine-related products including Zivania, Commandaria and Sousouko. Amongst the flower-lined streets and traditional architecture lies the village church, dedicated to St Mary. The Icon of St Mary of Valana, one of the oldest paintings in the world, is displayed in the church.
In Lania one can find an ancient and authentic Linos, a wine press, formerly used in the production of Commandaria. The entrance to the village is dominated by the old fountain from which villagers would get their drinking water and still today brings back memories of bygone times.

I totally fell in love with this village with it’s narrow stone streets and old stone houses, many of which have been restored and updated but kept their look and feel. And the amazing variety of floral plantings all along the streets and houses was beautiful. Somehow we missed the church, but did see the Linos. I guess because of the time of the year some of the places that usually are open, artists galleries and souvenir shops, even the Linos, were all closed. It was so quiet and peaceful and as we strolled the streets you could sense it. I could live in a place like this, long as they have Internet access! ;)

Omodos was the next stop. (from the website) Omodhos is located in the district of Limassol and is one of the best wine producing villages in Cyprus. It is about 35 kilometres (26 miles) from Limassol, 80 km from Nicosia and 7 km from Platres. The first view you get when you arrive in Omodhos is of its enormous big square, surrounded by whitewashed stone house, mulberry trees, tavernas, coffeehouse and souvenir shops. The village consists of many narrow streets, white houses and a picturesque church. The villagers speak the original Cypriot language and are very devoted to the contact with each other and their religious believes. Without doubt, when visiting Omodhos, one will be astonished by the women, farmers and traders who still maintain the traditional way of working.
For centuries, the people of Omodhos have worshipped and established this richness with care and devotion, which explains their, and my, proud. The inhabitants of the village Omodhos form a close community, who sometimes tend to exaggerate in their proud for their village. (Of course, we are just as common as any other villager in Cyprus, but we like to think of ourselves as the best people of the island. The village has a rich cultural heritage and is especially famous for its agricultural and natural resources, for example the many vineyards that can be found in and around the village.

A more detailed site for Omodos can be found here, giving the history of the village, the church, the wines and more. Including some links to photos of the inside the church. We weren’t allowed to photograph inside ourselves.

Omodos was much larger than Lania and of course had all the little tourist shops open as well as a few restaurants and taverns. We parked near the large village square and went there first. The entire square is paved, if that is the word to use, with stones and rocks mostly set on edge rather than flat, and you need some good shoes to walk on it very long! The walk down the square leads to the Monastery of the Holy Cross, a really lovely setting with the church in the center and the surrounding structure housing some artifacts and restored rooms now, as well as a museum for the National Struggle and a folk art museum as well is housed in one of the areas. We spent a good while in this area taking a few photos, outside of the church itself. :)
Being about lunchtime we decided to grab something to eat and drink and have
a sit down for a bit. Even up in the mountains it was still warm this day. We decided on a spot just across from the entrance to the square at a grill/restaurant/tavern. Like most place here the seating is outside as well as inside and we opted for a table out in the breeze under the umbrella. It also gave us a good view of all the activities. I had my first taste of Calamari here and actually liked it!. Well actually Alison ordered that, and me being the adventurous American tourist ordered a … cheeseburger! LOL Well it wasn’t the best tasting thing in the world mind you, probably some frozen beef patty, maybe containing beef somewhere in it, and some kind of very bland cheese. Cypriots do some really wonderful and great tasting Greek and Cypriot dishes, but they suck at American ones! LOL Well nevermind I ate it and it was filling. I tried the local Keo beer too, but wasn’t so fond of that either. Well what else goes with a burger… oh yes.. Pepsi please! lol Anyway we had a nice time sitting and talking and yes smooching too! ;) Right across the street there is part of a winery and all the time we were there the local farmers were transporting their grapes to sell. A steady stream of pickup trucks hauling crates of grapes and waiting in line to unload them. Quite interesting to see this side of things, instead of just seeing the bottles in the stores! We sat a right good while and then strolled around a bit more. We had been walking around 2 days now in the heat, between that and me trying to adjust to the time we were both ready to call it a day!
The villages were lovely to see and I liked Lania the best, just smaller and quieter and less touristy than Omodos., but both gorgeous villages and I loved it. Loved the guide more though :) Thanks my love for everything! XXX

In the evening I rode with Alison and JM to take him to the base at Akrotiri where he is in the Air Training Corps as a cadet. He wants to be a pilot and this program at the camp has given him a lot of good expereince and this summer he had his first solo flight! Amazing, he’s only 17 and already took off and landed a plane himself and I have just for the first time set foot on one!
So while he was doing his thinkg alison took me around to see some of the places she hangs out while she waits for him to get done with cadets. Most of the time she goes and caht with some friends at a little bar called Mom’s. Just a small place but a very nice relaxed feeling when you walk in. I got to meet Julie, a friend of Alison’s who has a son also in the cadets that she met and passes the time with. We sat there a short while and chatted, but had to leave before too long as we were supposed to go and meet Dee and Philip who live in Kolossi and then go back and pick JM up. Julie was nice enough to offer pick him up and to drop him off on the way so that we might have a longer visit with Dee. Dee works with Alison at 3D and is a lovely and very funny person. They have a gorgeous home and we sat and had a glass of wine or two and talked and the time passed so quickly. There are so many people I have come to know through Alison that she always see and tells me about I really would have liked to have met them all and spent more time with them, but we just couldnt manage to fit it all in with the short time we had. Everyone made me feel so at ease and in a way I felt I had already met them and they said the same about me! :) Well we had to meet up with Julie to get Jm and then headed home. We hadn’t eaten yet so aliosn stopped at a take away place and I had my first taste of sheftalia, a Cyrpriot style grilled sausage of sorts . Oh I loved this! it was in a pita bread with tomatoes and cucumbers.. wonderful taste, and I have been craving it ever since I got back to the states!

Another wonderful day that passed much too fast, but memories that will last me a lifetime. I love Cyprus, and especially one Cyprus angel! :)

I have had a few instances and occurences happen over the last couple of months, maybe they are just coincidence, but I like to think that they are signs she sends to let me know she's there. Maybe I'm deluding myself, but it helps me get through.

 
The first one was at the funeral home at the first viewing. Due to having a heart attack at her age, an autopsy was required. Two days had gone by, I was so guilt ridden that I didn't do everything I could have done to help her, it was killing me. The burden on top of losing my angel, was beginning to be unbearable. Whne we went into see her for the first time at the viewing, I broke down,  I sobbed heavily and asked her to forgive me if I hadn't done all I could. It wasn't 2 minutes later that the medical examiners report came in. A friend of the family who is a medical person, looked at the findings and explained them to us. He said that even if she had been in the hospital on a table in the emegency rom at the time it happened, there was nothing even they could have done. I cried again and thanked Gretchen for taking that part of the pain away. I knew she was with us.
   
The next one was the folllowing day. We had each made plans to put a few personal things in the casket, photos, flowers, etc and also one of her favorite things.. a fireball (candy) .  I had gotten a couple of pictures and one from my daughter together to have them ready for the next day. We put them on the desk that evening, and with all the numbness and confusion I guess we forgot the fireball.  That evening when the xanax and the tiredness finally kicked in, I went to the bedroom to get into bed. I looked down and saw something on the floor by my side of the bed. A FIREBALL right there midways between the bed and wall. It just stood out. Now I suppose it is possible that I had put on in my pocket and it fell out sometime during the day or that maybe I had put it on the nightstand and it fell off, but I took it as a sign that she was around to make sure we didn't forget it.
 There were a couple of more that I wont go into for personal reasons, but I felt in her hand in them.
 
I was feeling very down a few days ago, having a few financial issues going on, and also thinking about our anniversary coming up in a couple of months,  all in all a down day. I had to go to the store to get a few things, some drinks, Mt. Dew, (Gretchen always made sure there were plenty at the house) and a cople of other items. So I'm kinda going along trying to just get the stuff and get out. (The only local store is also the same company we worked together). I go down the drink aisle, and grab 2 6 packs of Mt Dew, and the expiration date just stands right..NOV 29, 2004.. which just happens to be our anniversary. I know, just coincidence to many, but to me it lightened my load. Maybe we're just sensitive to things like this during this ordeal. I dunno. Got home, had the tv gong in the background and twice that day , either some game show or talk shows , I heard the name Gretchen..My ears perked up. Now I know its not a rare name, but it's not one you hear everyday.. and twice I heard it. one was contestant, the other a guest on someshow.. don't even remember the show, just hearing the name.. it was kinda eery, kinda comforting.. Maybe I just miss her so much I want to see and hear stuff.. I do feel like she's there looking out for us,  I just wish so bad I could hold in in my arms again. I miss that so very much.

Looking back, I guess I was still in a somewhat state of shock during the first few days.  The day is still mostly a blur. The things I remember:
 
Getting dressed: I remember putting on my suit and thinking back to the time that I bought it.  When Gretchen's grandmother died a few years ago, I didn't have a suit that fitted me. The only one I had was one from when we were first married, and our social life never really involved a lot of dressing up.. So of course that one was way too small.  So we went out to buy one. Gretchen helped me pick it out.  Weird the things that come to your mind during times like this..  

 
Family viewing:
The family had a special time a couple of hours prior to the funeral . I remember the kids and I each giving her a rose, and saying our last private goodbye.. sigh…
 I remember the enormous amount of flowers and plants also, I know she would have been amazed at the amount and the beauty. Gretchen always had this thing of wanting pictures of flowers at family funerals, so I wanted to make sure we took some. I have to thank my son-in-law James for supplying a steady hand and getting some nice photos. I know I couldn't have taken them in the state I was in.  
 
The service:
I remember getting into the limo. Thankfully the church  is probably only a mile from the house. I don't know what I would have done if it ahd been a long ride.. The thing I remember most  was being amazed at the amount of pepople there. They were parking cars in an adjacent empty field.. I was amazed at the amount of people that she touched in her life, It made me proud  and at the same time I felt an overwhelming sense of loss that was shared by the whole community, family and friends.. many who came from out of state. God she was so loved.. 
 
The service itself, from the little I can (want to) remember, was very touching. I remember hearing a few of the testimonials, and    
I do remember Kara singing, I was really touched by her thoughtfulness and the love she showed by offering to sing, especially when she was feeling very sick..
 I do remember during the closing of the service really losing it when the pastor brought me and the kids each a flower from the pall.. Along with a small white dove that was part of the pall.. (We are pressing and drying them and are going to put them in a bible that was aprt of one of the arrangements).
Also when the pall bearers each walked by and placed their carnations on the casket, it really tore me up..
I received an audio tape of the service a couple of days ago, but I can't bring myself to listen to it yet. I did put it in and immediately cut it off..  
And I remember the so many people who came and offered their condolences and support. I think I shed more tears in public in those two hours than I have in my entire life.
The rest of the day is vague, I remeber some good friends at the house that afternoon, and so much food and drinks that were brought by. I thank everyone for all their support during those first days. I don't think I would have made it through without all the love that was shown to us.